Be Honest With Yourself Even When It Isn't Easy. 255.1 pounds, + 4.2 pounds today, + 5.2 pounds this week, - 1.3 pounds this month, - 77.9 pounds overall

Being honest with yourself isn't always easy. There are days when you know you've gone in the wrong direction and you want to avoid the truth of what you did. Yesterday was Thanksgiving and I knew that I was going to eat a lot and that I would gain weight and I was fine with that. Today, however, it is more than a bit painful to admit that I gained 4 pounds yesterday and 6 pounds in the past 2 days. Unbelievable, but yet that is reality.

Do I regret eating everything I could yesterday, yes and no. I ate enough calories yesterday to last me a week. The food was delicious and I'm so glad I enjoyed it. Today, however, I wish I hadn't enjoyed it so much or eaten so much.

There is a climactic scene in one of the Jason Bourne movies where Jason is confronting a person from his past in order to find out about who he is. SPOILER ALERT if you haven't watched the movies. He finally is able to confront the person who was part of his initial training, and as Jason is blasting this man for what was done to him, this man, played wonderfully by Albert Finney, forcefully tells Jason that he chose this for himself. He is the reason he is this way because of the choice he made. I have to face that reality for myself if I'm going to be able to change.

Today is going to be a great day. It is really cold outside so we are staying indoors and we will be playing games and watching games. I feel full from yesterday and not hungry, so I'm going to try to ride this wave as long as possible of not eating today and if I get too hungry I'm going to try to eat things that won't cause me to eat a ton more. We'll see what happens today and we'll see what the scale says tomorrow morning!