Monday Motivation

This is the place where every Monday I provide an article related to the issue of motivation for weight loss. Let's be honest, there are countless ways that one can lose weight. Typically this involves a combination of exercise and diet. The question isn't so much as to how to lose weight, but how to be motivated to lose weight and keep it off. That is what I am discussing here. 

How to Stay Motivated After Achieving Your Goal

Achieving a weight loss goal feels amazing. You've worked so hard for this accomplishment and you want to reward yourself. It is natural to take your foot off the gas and to relax since you finally reached the milestone that took a great deal of effort to achieve. Celebrating is great, but the question arrises about how to keep yourself motivated now that you achieved a major goal?

I've lost 100 pounds and I know this struggle very well and in many different regards. First of all, there is a desire to celebrate the achievement. For me, celebrations almost always involve food, the more the better. The richer the better. Desserts are almost a requirement for a celebration to be legal. I need to find a different way to celebrate when I achieve goals. 

Second, celebrations that result in taking a step back in progress might feel good at the moment, but there is a price to be paid and this price is very heavy when you end up actually going in the opposite direction of the goal you had achieved. How frustrating it is when you cross a finish line and then after celebrating you realize that you actually walked backwards to a place you were before crossing the finish line. 

Third, the nature of attaining goals involves work, focus, commitment, dedication, and sacrifice. As difficult as it is to maintain all of this at the level necessary to achieve a goal, it is even harder to maintain all of this after having achieved the goal. You worked hard and crossed a finish line. Shouldn't you be rewarded? And isn't part of that reward you ability to take a break, to relax, to reward yourself in some way? That is a natural, and perhaps necessary desire. But following this path can lead not only to taking steps backwards, but for many people, it builds on itself and can result in losing all of the progress that has been made along the way, not just one step back, but all steps back. 

So what is a person to do?

From my experience, celebrating goal achievement is good and healthy, but it needs to be limited in time and in scope. Taking a break for a day or two can be rejuvenating. But going much longer than this can lead to a prolonged reversal of your progress. Also, celebrating with eating too much food or foods you normally should not eat can also lead to a spiral of eating that got you into the mess you were in to begin with. Fight the temptation to eat large amounts of the wrong food. Celebrate with friends who will recognize your accomplishment and encourage you. Don't celebrate by eating the wrong things. This would be like an alcoholic celebrating a year of sobriety with an alcoholic drink. It doesn't make sense for an alcoholic to do this , so why would celebrating a healthy goal achievement make sense to do so by eating too much of the wrong things?

When you achieve one goal with weight loss, you need to focus on a new goals as quickly as possible. If you haven't lost all of the weight you want to then focus on the next milestone you want to achieve. If you have lost all of the weight you want to, then focus on racking up as many days in a row of maintaining your current weight. Be sure to weigh yourself daily and if your weight creeps back up, get back on the plan you followed to lose the weight in the first place. 

Key Application

Celebrate when you reach milestones with weight loss, but make sure to do so in moderation, for a limited time, and don't do it by eating foods you shouldn't eat if you want to lose weight. Think of the next goal you want to achieve and take action toward that as soon as possible, whether it is to lose more weight or if it is to maintain your current weight. Weigh yourself daily and do what you need to in order to achieve that goal. You are worth it, so do it for yourself and for those you love. 

Hitting a Plateau? Here is How You Break Through

No matter how hard you work and how much weight you lose, you should be prepared to hit a plateau on your journey. The question when that happens is how will you respond? 

I've lost weight and gained weight more times than I care to remember. In the process of losing weight it has never been a consistent path of progress. Two steps forward one step back. Besides gaining weight I also hit plateaus along the way. When plateaus inevitably happen I've found that I have 3 ways to respond, and they aren't all equal. 

The first option, and easiest choice when faced with a plateau is to give up. Why bother moving forward, especially if you've done all you can to overcome this pause in your progress? Just give up, right? Wrong. Plateaus don't last forever and you've come too far to quit, so don't. 

The second option is the natural one to pick. This option involves staying the course with the plan you have followed that has brought you the success you've experienced. Plateaus are inevitable, but they don't last forever, so sticking with your plan that brought you success should eventually bring you more success. This is a good plan and it should succeed, but it isn't the only good plan. This option can work if you are patient. The problem is that it can be very difficult to be patient to wait for the results. That is why it might not be the best option.  

The third option to overcome plateaus is likely the best of the three for most people. This option involves moving forward, but choosing a different path than the one that you've been on to get you to this point. Switching things up can give you the mental energy you need to continue the fight, and that alone is reason enough to choose this option. You don't need to switch your plan radically, or permanently, but it you do change it you will have a great chance over overcoming your plateau sooner rather than later. 

As long as you choose an option to continue the fight you will succeed, so fight on and win this battle. 

Key Application

Your weight loss journey will involve setbacks and plateaus, so don't be surprised when they happen. The question you have to answer is what are you going to do when you are faced with these discouraging results. Your answer will determine your success. You have choices of how to respond. You need to choose to continue the fight, whether that involves staying the course or switching up your approach. Whichever direction you decide to go in, just make sure you don't give up. Staying in the fight will result in succss, so fight on. You are worth it. 

Being More Specific and Detailed About Your Future Self Will Give Quicker Results

How often have you dreamed of doing something only for that dream to never happen? We've all done that a thousand times. 

Dreaming of doing something or becoming something can produce pleasurable thoughts in our minds, but why do they rarely lead to achieving the result we dream of? The answer, according to Dr. Benjamin Hardy, lies in the fact that these dreams lack specifics and detail. 

In his book, Be Your Future Self Now. Dr. Benjamin Hardy shares the 4th truth to becoming what you want to be: the more vivid and detailed you are about who you want to become, the faster you will progress to this goal. For anyone trying to lose weight and become healthier, this doesn't just mean having a picture on a wall of someone who is fitter than you that you want to look like, although that can help. You also need to be detailed about the steps it will take to become like that person. 

Success takes Intentional effort, but the effort needs to be focused on a goal and the steps necessary to achieve the goal. The more specific and detailed the steps in the process, the more likely that success will be achieved. I've seen this in my own life.

My Story

For the longest time I've wanted to lose weight. I can see fit people on TV or in my own life who are physically fit and just seeing them motivates me to be like them. The problem, of course, is that this is just the first part of the process, and in the past this is where I've stopped. I've failed to find out the steps along the way that are necessary to become fit, and so I've failed to make any meaningful, ongoing changes that are necessary for change. 

As I have become more focused on my goal of losing weight, I have become more detailed about the steps necessary for this to happen, and the results have been remarkable. I hope you too will go beyond a vague wish to be healthy and will become more invested in the process required for success, whatever that might look like for you. 

Key Application

The more vague you are about what your goals for becoming healthy the more difficult it will be for you to change. Therefore, be as specific and detailed about who you want to become, what you will look like and act like, and most important, determining the necessary steps to achieve your goal, because the greater the details of the steps, the greater the odd are that you will achieve them.

You Can't Escape Your Future Self, So Dream Big And Start Small

Everything you do has a consequence, so your future self is a result of the choices you make today. So the question is, what decisions will you make today to impact your future self? 

Jim Rohn said, "Discipline weighs ounces while regrets weigh tons." The point being is that doing what you know to be right today might seem difficult, but in reality, it is much easier than living with the regrets you will have about not following through in the moment. 

Dr. Benjamin Hardy addresses the compounding effect of your actions today on your future self in his book, Be Your Future Self Now. His third truth about the future self is that there will always be consequences for the future self that are the direct result of the decisions you make today. 

He states that everything you do is either a cost or an investment in your future self, so choose wisely. When you make decisions to do the right thing today, no matter how hard or difficult, your future self grows more capable, free, and mature. In fact, your future self is the compounded effect of your actions now. 

How Best To Make Decisions

The best way to approach the change that Is necessary for the results you wan tin the future is to have a large vision of the goal you want to achieve, but when you begin do so by taking the smallest steps possible to get yourself going in the right direction, to feel a sense of accomplishment, and to build momentum.

Be willing to be a beginner. If not, you are making it harder to achieve what you really want. Small investments lead to big investments, but you need to be willing to start small. It builds momentum, commitment, and results. Dr. David Hawkins believes that, "The unconscious will only us to have what we believe we deserve," so take small actions to build momentum of what you believe you deserve. 

Key Application

Your future self will be the result of the actions you take today, whether they are an investment or a cost. The actions you take today have a compounding effect on your future. The best way to start is to have a grand vision, but take the smallest steps possible to achieve small victories that build momentum over time. Your actions, your wins, and your vision will build over time. 

Your Expectations Of Who You Will Be In The Future Are Wrong

Are you ever amazed at the person you are now compared with the person you were 10 years ago? If you are like most people, you can look back with wonder about the changes you've experienced in who you are and how you see the world, but when you think about the future you don't expect that you will change very much, and you would be wrong. 

Dr. Benjamin Hardy addresses this wrong thinking in his book, Be Your Future Self Now. When you think of interests, perspectives, values, circumstances, focus or goals, they are all subject to change. The problem for most people is that we don't expect to change even though we have ample evidence from our past that we do and will change. Hardy quotes Harvard psychologist, Dr. Daniel Gilbert, who explains that this is likely due to "the ease of remembering and the difficulty of imaging." 

This difficulty of imaging a new self is a result of what Stanford psychologist, Dr. Carol Dweck, calls a fixed mindset, where we can't imagine changing and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. There is a lack of imagination about the future self due to a lack of confidence and a fragile identity, resulting in avoiding any form of failure. Ultimately, people with a fixed mindset believe that who they are now is their core self, rather than a snapshot of themselves at a given time. 

The Solution

The way out of this fixed mindset Is to view your future self as a different person than who you are today. Your current self is temporary. You can adopt a growth mindset to understand that your future self can be very different than your current self.  Your thoughts about your future self are likely wrong because you have a fixed mindset and think that who you are now is who you will be in the future.

Key Application

You need to have psychological flexibility and to realize that your future self is a different person than who you are now, one who is determined by your actions, attitudes, and beliefs, and you have the power to change those, thus changing who you will be in the future. In terms of your health, if you think that you are incapable of changing you will be right, but if you realize that you can be a different person in the future and you change your attitudes, mindset and behaviors by being psychologically flexible, your future self will be a different person than who you are today. 

Your Vision of Your Future Drives Your Present

Have you ever walked down a street and caught a glimpse of your reflection in a window? I have, and I've been surprised at what I've seen. My vision of myself is skewed in the direction of seeing myself as healthier than I really am. When I look in the mirror I typically only look from the neck up and I don't see my whole body, so when I see myself in a reflection when I'm out in public I'm shocked. It is then that I recalibrate my vision of my future self that is much different than the present. This vision drives me to change my behavior now in order to become what I see for my self in the future. 

In his book, Be Your Future Self Now, Dr. Benjamin Hardy transitions from 7 threats to your future self to 7 truths about your future self. He quotes Martin Luther King, Jr., who said, "If a man hasn't found something he will die for, he isn't fit to live." Dr. Hardy presents 3 questions we should ask when thinking about the person we will become in the future. First, who will your future self be? Second, what life will you live? Third, what will you commit yourself to? 

Ultimately, our future self is determined by our beliefs. The first of the 7 truths about your future self, "Your Future Drives Your Present," Dr. Hardy quotes Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Shallow men believe in luck ... Strong men believe in cause and effect." Do you believe that you have control over your future, that it can be designed and influenced by your behavior and choices, or is it random and subject to chance? If you have control over your future to one degree or another then you need to focus your beliefs and actions accordingly. 

Dr. Hardy takes issue with the modern self-help world that has shifted from having definite attitudes about the future to indefinite attitudes, which then says that you should forget goals and focus on process. Process is important, but he states that it is impossible to live in a purely process driven way without any respect for outcomes, goals, or objectives. 

Having specific goals help us because they create constraints that guide us. "Focus on the goal right in front of you, and do that again and again, knowing these are the critical steps to the overarching goal," whatever that might be. 

Dr. Hardy concludes the chapter by stating, "Human beings are intelligent to the extent they are Intentional, conscious, and honest about the goals that are driving them."

Key Application

Your future is not random, it is created by your actions, attitudes and goals. By being specific about the future self you want to become, creating a plan for getting there and taking action will result in you becoming your future self more quickly and accurately than if you believe life happens by chance.  

It can be Harder to Stay On Top than it is to Get to the Top

I've worked hard in the past to lose weight and I've achieved success, only then to put all of the weight back on, and then some. Why? How does this happen? How can it be that I work so hard to lose weight only to then have my success be reversed? 

In his book, Be Your Future Self Now, Dr. Benjamin Hardy addresses the 7th threat to true transformation when he quotes legendary NFL coach, Bill Walsh, "Success Disease makes people begin to forego to different degrees the effort, focus, discipline, teaching, teamwork, learning, and attention to detail the brought 'mastery' and its progeny, success." In other words, we turn our backs on what brought us success in the first place and we fall back into the habits and patterns that produced the bad outcomes we had worked so hard to get away from. 

But why do we do this?

Dr. Hardy answers this by quoting Dr. Gay Hendricks, who writes, "Each of us has an inner thermostat setting that determines how much love, success, and creativity we allow ourselves to enjoy. When we exceed our inner thermostat setting, we will often do something to sabotage ourselves, causing us to drop back into the old, familiar zone where we feel secure." Ouch! That's painful to learn that we are the problem for our lack of sustained success. But it is helpful. Without knowing this truth we are doomed to repeat the cycle. 

When we achieve success we naturally become complacent, soft, and lazy and we can easily stop the disciplines it took to become successful. How easy, and common, is it for me to lose 5 or 10 pounds of weight and become excited and then want to celebrate this weight loss by rewarding myself with a sweet treat! Unbelievable. My failure is baked into my success (pun intended). 

The answer?

We need to remember the discipline It took to achieve success and then stay focussed on achieving the next milestone, whether that is losing more weight or maintaining the new, current weight that has been reached. Without that focus and commitment, the old habits that caused poor health will return. 

Key Application

When you achieve success in getting healthier you must work even harder to maintain what got you there: focus, discipline, and dedication; otherwise you are bound to lose all of your hard earned success. 

You Can't Win If You Are Not In The Arena

How long I have thought about losing weight without doing anything about it. As the saying goes, you miss every shot you don't take. You have to be engaged in the effort of losing weight if you are going to make progress and be successful. 

In his book, Be Your Future Self Now, Dr. Benjamin Hardy addresses the 6th threat to true transformation. He writes that not being in the arena is failing by default.

People stay out of the arena for many reasons, with fear being one of the biggest feelings holding us back. We fear change, hard work, failure and even success. By staying out of the arena we are letting fear win. 

Staying outside of the arena "may feel safe, but it is the the most dangerous place you could be." You will remain ignorant of your own ignorance on what it takes to truly change. It also leads to a life of regrets. 

The opposite of fear Is courage. Courage "is to proactively pursue a noble and worthwhile goal involving risk." What is the risk in trying to lose weight? You might not succeed, it might take longer than you expect, it requires you to change, and on and on the list goes. 

Courage "is the doorway to all positive change." Courage is required because you will fail, and you have to embrace the ramifications of that failure. You will expose yourself to criticism and facing your own insecurities. Courage is required to deal with who you have been and acknowledging your need to change, with no guarantee of success. 

The time to address your fear and enter the arena Is now. because "the longer you wait to get into the arena, the more you limit your future self." 

The key Is to get Into the arena because it means "you're finally facing and embracing reality. In the arena, you're no longer afraid of reality because it has become your instructor." 

Key Application

Change is not possible without getting into the arena, so be courageous and overcome your fears and enter the arena. Your future self will thank you. 

Connect With Your Future Self To Make Investing In Your Future Easier

Winter is coming to Minnesota so I switched out my closet from the short sleeved shirts I wear in the summer to the long sleeved shirts I wear during our cold winters here in the north. I tried some of the winter shirts on and found that there are a number that I are too small for me. My immediate thought was how nice it will be when I fit into these shirts before the end of winter. According to Dr. Benjamin Hardy, having small goals can limit a person's ability to become everything they can be.  

Dr. Hardy writes about the power of big goals in his book, Be Your Future Self Now, where he shares that the 5th threat to becoming the person you really want to be happens when you have short term goals and a limited vision. These keep a person from becoming everything they possibly can become. He advises that people connect with a bigger future. "If you get serious, and start investing and learning, where could you be in five years?" We need to change our focus from the immediate to that which is much bigger and farther out." 

This seems counterintuitive to wanting to lose weight. Typically, the people that don't focus on the immediate won't do what is necessary to make the small changes that result in progress. What Dr. Hardy is suggesting is that looking farther into the future with a vision of your future self will allow you to create the life now that aligns with this more distant self. Without this long term vision a person is less likely to achieve the long term goals they have for themselves. You need to focus on what you are not currently capable of, and then you will figure out how to achieve this goal in a way that is much more productive than simply settling for achieving smaller goals that don't connect with bigger, long term goals.  

Key Application

Create a vision of who you want to be in the long term and you will then have a powerful drive to make significant changes that are necessary now to achieve these goals. 

Connect With Your Future Self To Make Investing In Your Future Easier

I knew what I wanted and I wasn't going to be stopped. I walked to the refrigerator, I bent down and opened the freezer and I grabbed the peppermint bark ice cream bar. I held it in my hand and as I thought about how good it was going to taste. Then I thought about the person I was going to be the next day and how that person would be disappointed by the action I was about to make. Thinking about tomorrow me being upset with today me caused me to put the ice cream bar back in the freezer and walk away from my original plan. Rather than costing my Future Self, I made an investment in the person I wanted to become. 

Dr. Benjamin Hardy writes about the power of thinking about your future self in his book, Be Your Future Self Now. The 4th threat to becoming the person you really want to be happens when being disconnected from your future self leads to myopic decisions. We typically make short-sighted decisions that reward us now but are bad for our long-term self. Acting on this type of thinking keeps us from becoming the person we truly want to be. 

The first step to dealing with this problem Is to be connected to your "Future Self," and the best way to do that is to see your Future Self as a different person than the one you are today. This allow you to have empathy for that person so you are better able to make decisions for the good of that person rather than gratifying your immediate desires.

This Future Self sees things differently than you do now, cares about things differently than you do now, and acts differently than you do now. The more you can care about your Future Self, moving from liking to loving this person, the more you will be able to move from sacrificing for this person to the idea of investing in this other person, your Future Self. The beauty of this is found "as your vision of your Future Self grows, your present happiness and motivation increases."

Ultimately, you need to see that everything is either a cost or an investment in your Future Self. Having that ice cream bar is a cost to your future self. Putting the ice cream bar back in the freezer so someone else can eat it is an investment. The more vivid and specific you can make your Future Self, the more compelling it will be to invest in this person. To maximize the impact of this relationship, write a letter from your Future Self to your current self where you describe what your life is like at some point in the future based on actions taken in the present. This will cause you to more easily make decisions today that are investments in your Future Self, rather than making choices that cost your future self.  

Key Application

Creating deeper and specific connections with the Future Self you want to be will make it easier to make choices today that invest in take away from the Future Self you want to become. 

Choose Your Influences Wisely to Shape Your Future

One summer while in college I painted townhomes to make money for school. I remember that when I finished painting one townhome I would grab my ladder and paint and literally run to the next townhome and start painting. It wasn't until the end of the summer that I realized that I didn't need to run between buildings. So why did I feel the need to run in the first place?

It turns out that, unbeknownst to me at the time, my supervisor who was part of our crew and also painted with us, was training to run a marathon. He ran between townhomes to try to get a bit of a workout during the work day. I saw him do this so I thought it was an expectation of the job that we all needed to run between buildings. Who knew that I was training for a marathon! Dr. Benjamin Hardy addresses this kind of influence in his book, Be Your Future Self Now. 

The third threat to growth and change Dr. Hardy addresses in his book is being unaware of the impact on your environment on your goals. As I can attest from my summer job experience, environment definitely impacts people in ways that we aren't even aware of as it happens. Researchers call this the Pygmalion effect. This is the term used to describe the reality that we often perform to the expectations of people around us, whether people have high or low expectations of us. Our social interactions shape who we are and what we do. 

The next social situation Dr. Hardy addresses is one where of our desires are impacted just by being exposed to something. This is what happens when we watch commercials and we are influenced to buy a product simply because we were exposed to it. This impact is called the mere-exposure effect. Charlie Jones addresses this by stating, "You will be the same person in 5 years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read." If you want to change who you are and who you are becoming then you need to change your inputs and influences. 

The great news is that people have the ability to imagine the future self they want to become and they can make this a reality shaping their  environment to pull themselves in the direction they want to go. This means if you want to be healthy, surround yourself with people who are where you want to be or who are on the path you want to go down, who can support you as you go.

Your environment influences who you are and will become by pulling is in certain directions and exposing you to possibilities that you weren't aware of before. 

Key Application

Because you are the product of your environment, you need to create the future self you want to be by choosing your influences, specifically the friends and acquaintances you spend time with that align with who you want to be and can show you possibilities to live in ways different than to experience today. 

Reframe Your Past To Serve Your Present and Future

I was walking up the stairs to the third floor of my high school to go to class. A good friend was with a friend of his and completely out of the blue my friend called me a name to make fun of my weight. I knew he did this to try to impress his friend, but to be called a name by my good friend really hurt. This happened over 30 years ago and I still remember it like it was yesterday, but I've never known what to do with this experience. Until now. 

In his book, Be Your Future Self Now, Dr. Benjamin Hardy deals with the second threat to becoming the person you want to be: the narrative of the past that we tell ourselves. My immediate thought about this is that the narrative of the past carved in stone, isn't it? I mean, things happen to us and they make us feel good or bad or any number of emotions, but you can't do anything to change the past so how can your emotions about the past be changed, right?!

Dr. Hardy doesn't believe that is how it needs to be. He writes that when we frame our past negatively, our goals become reactive to the past, they become short-term where we try to escape the pain of the present. This causes us to be reactive, where life happens to us rather than for us. We become victims of what life has done to us. Being an emotional eater, when I think of a negative past experience, whether it was something done to me or something that I did that I regret, I want to get rid of bad feelings by eating something that will make me feel better, and it usually isn't something good for me, like cake or ice cream.

Dr. Hardy share that we are emotionally healthy when we have both a positive past and an exciting future. This sure seems obvious. I mean, who wouldn't feel great if their past was positive and the future was exciting?! However, he responds to this by writing, "Having a positive past depends very little on what events actually occurred. What happened to you doesn't matter as much as what story you decide to tell yourself about what happened." This is because the emotions we feel about the past are what matter the most. So if we can reframe our thoughts and feelings about the past then we can be emotionally healthy. 

Here is the great news: according to research, we get to choose the story we attach to the past. With this, we are able to have the past serve us as we focus on the future person we want to become. The pain of our past can help us change in the future, depending on how we frame it. "With deliberate practice, you can develop the skill of positively reframing any past experience into a gain. With practice, you can get better and quicker at converting pain into growth and purpose." 

So now when I think about being called a name by my good friend in high school, I know that I get to choose the narrative I tell myself. I know that my friend called me that name to impress his friend. At that moment, my friend decided to place impressing his other friend at a higher level of importance than his friendship with me. My friend calling me a name wasn't about me, it was about his insecurity and his desire to deal with it by risking his relationship with me so he could impress his other friend. I feel sorry for the young man my friend was who felt the need to do this. This name calling was about my friend and his issues, not about me. 

I am still great friends with this person and he is a kind, wonderful man that I love like a brother. And before I give the impression that I'm a saint, to my shame, I have to admit that I've done what my good friend did, so I know the motivation behind it. My wish is for anyone that has experienced something like this that they would reframe their past hurt in a positive way and understand that anything negative done or said about them is a negative reflection of the person who hurt them, not they themselves. 

Why is this so important? Because, according to Dr. Hardy, our narrative about the past impacts how we think about the present and about our future selves. So when memories of your past come up that are negative, reframe them positively so you can live a better life now and in the future. 

Key Application

Your memories from the past will negatively impact your present and future if you do not reframe them positively. You have the ability to do just that, so take care of yourself and reframe your narrative in a way that serves you rather than harms you. 

Success Is Not Possible Without Hope

There have been times in my life where I've felt hopeless to do anything about my weight. I didn't feel like it was worth it to try to lose weight because every time I had success I eventually put whatever weight I had lost back on, and then some. Without hope for a better future, why try?

In his book, Be Your Future Self Now, Dr. Benjamin Hardy shares 7 threats to your future self. The first threat is to to live without hope. Without hope in a better future, we won't take the steps necessary to change our present. 

Without hope, motivation is impossible. Without hope, you don't have clear goals or a sense of purpose for your life. 

But with hope, change is possible. Hope has been described as both the will and the way.

"Hope is the way because to have hope, you either see a way to realize your goal, or are flexible enough to create a way. When hope exists, there is a way. Hope does not consider the odds." 

Hope is more powerful than optimism because hope goes beyond a general sense of a better future and it leads to a plan and action from the belief that change can happen and the future can be different than the present. 

To be a hopeful person, "You commit to the goal, not to the process. You don't get stuck in your current way of doing and thinking. Patiently, persistently you adapt and you find new and better ways to get to where you want to go." 

And so, I begin my weight loss journey with hope, knowing that my actions today will result in a better, healthier tomorrow. I may need to change my plan along the way, but the goal of becoming healthy and losing weight remains the same. I have hope, regardless of the time or the struggle involved that change is possible, so I move forward.  

Key Application

Begin your pursuit of better health with hope as your foundation, hope that you can create a better tomorrow from the actions you take today. You can do this, with hope as the wind in your sails. 

The Best Weight Loss Plan

There is good news and bad news when it comes to weight loss plans. The good news: there are a ton of weight loss plans to choose from. The bad news: there are a ton of plans to choose from. So this leaves us with a dilemma. How is a person supposed to choose a plan to follow? Certainly, you should consult your doctor when making lifestyle choices that impact your physical health. 

Making this decision making process worse is the fact that there are so many options that work, and there are so many options that are highly ranked. 

What Is a person to do?

Well, I can't tell you what weight loss plan is right for you. My recommendation is to look at more than one option and ask questions to see if it makes sense for your situation, then pick one and try it. Give it enough time to see if it works for you. "Works for you" is the key phrase. Just because a weight loss plan works for someone else doesn't mean that it will work for you. It isn't because your biology is so different than others that the plan won't work for you, but your background, life experiences, and current situation is unique, so a plan that works for someone else might not work for you, and that's alright. 

You need to do you. Like trying on clothes at a store, you need to try different options to see If there is one that is a better fit for you than another. The "fit" doesn't mean only that you lose weight. It means that everything that goes into making it work over time "fits" who you are and how it works for you.

Ultimately, the best plan for you is the one you will stick with over time. That means you might have to try a few different plans, but find one that you think "fits" and go with it. 

Key Application

To find a weight loss plan that works for you, don't assume that someone else's plan is the one you should follow. What worked for them might not work for you. You have a unique background and current situation, so consult a doctor and find a plan that you think will work for you, one that you can live with and you will stick with, and try it. If you find that it isn't working and you need to change, that's fine. Just learn from your experiences and choose the next best plan. 

Determining Why You Want To Lose Weight

Why do New Year's resolutions fail for so many people? There are a number of reasons for this, but there is one that foundational to them all. When people make their resolutions they typically aren't resolving anything. They are dreaming and wishing for results. Not only are these dreams not based in true resolve, they are not tied to the individual, unique "why" that each person needs to wrestle with in order to truly make progress on their dreams. 

I have started and failed at losing weight more times than I care to remember. I have successfully lost weight, 50, 60, even 80 pounds, only to gain it back and then some. Why? This is a question I've asked myself many times. After years of wrestling with this, I think I have an answer. 

I firmly believe that the main reason my progress has not been sustained is that I have never truly connected my efforts with a significant "why." I've wanted to lose weight for many reasons: to feel better, to be healthier, to look better, etc. I haven't really, truly focused on a significant reason why I want to lose weight. Most importantly, I haven't clearly identified my own, specific, personal, meaningful, lasting "why."

This "why" doesn't have to be one thing, but the deeper it touches my soul the more powerful it will be in motivating me to face all of the difficulties and challenges that inevitably come with making changes that result with significant and lasting change. 

For me, after years of avoiding the obvious (and living in denial of reality), I've had to realize that my family is my foundational "why." I not only want to live a long life to see my kids all marry and have kids of their own, but I want the quality of my life to be the best it can possibly be so that the time I have with my family is wonderful and not diminished by my physical limitations. There is so much more I could write about this, about my past and my hopes for the future, but for now I'll leave it at that: my family is my "why."

Key Question

What is your "why?" What is the foundational reason that you want to become healthier? What will motivate you to keep going when you face challenges in your journey? Unless you determine your true, deeply personal and motivating "why," don't be surprised when your efforts to change don't give you the lasting, sustained results you are hoping for.  

Fail Like an Olympian

I watched the summer Olympics this past weekend and I felt like an Olympian, and not for their accomplishments but because of their failures. In men's gymnastics competition there were falls from the pommel horse. In women's there were falls from the balance beam.  

Every 4 years when the summer Olympics are held I am fascinated by the gymnastics programs. My appreciation for the talent on the television is just because the men and women are amazingly talented, but because in a high school gym class we had a section on gymnastics where we had to attempt (emphasis on attempt) to use all of the devices used in the Olympics. The competitors in the Olympics make their unbelievable routines look easy. Having attempted, and failed, to make the smallest of moves on the pommel horse, I am in awe of what the men do on that device. 

My appreciation for the talent of these Olympians is only surpassed by how impressive they are when they respond to setbacks. I cannot imagine all of the practice and talent that goes into being able to compete on the balance beam or the pommel horse. When these athletes fall on the biggest stage that they have worked 4 years to be on, they take breath and get back on the device and finish what they started. Amazing. 

When I fail at my task of trying to lose weight I am easily tempted to throw in the towel and give up. I've lost 20 pounds in recent months, which I'm really excited about. Then I have a weekend where I gain nearly 5 pounds and I am ready to throw away all of my progress and give up. 

How fantastic to have an example of athletes who have the world watching what they do and they don't give up. If they can keep going, why can't I? I need to follow the example of these champions who are competing at the highest level of their sport. If they can keep going when the world is watching, I need to keep going when no one is watching. 

Key Value Proposition

When I feel like I've failed, keep going, don't give up, and fight through the temptation to quit because better days are ahead. 

Almost Half of Cancer Deaths Could Be Prevented

A major study from the American Cancer Society reveals that nearly half of all cancer cases and deaths could be prevented with lifestyle changes. We all know that smoking is a major cause of cancer, but do we realize the role these other factors play as risk factors for cancer: excess body weight, alcohol consumption, physical inactivity and diet? 

The good news is that we can make changes in all of these areas and greatly reduce our risk of cancer. 

Key Value Proposition

You have the power to change your destiny, so educate yourself and take action. 

This Demands Urgency

We live our lives according to the lie that we can live anyway we want today and tomorrow we will do what is necessary to change.  I know that has been the way I have thought for most of my life. The problem is that tomorrow never comes and I never consistently do what I need to change. My mindset has to change, today.

I am writing this on Father's Day, 2024. My family blesses me by their loving words and actions and I appreciate them all. I think of what a blessing they are and I am so glad for the life I have. But there is a problem that no one acknowledges: the elephant in the room. It is my weight. I am the elephant in the room that my family is too nice to say anything about. It is time for me to face reality. 

I am obese, and have been for most of my adult life. For many years I have been, according the the U.S. Government, morbidly obese. I weight about 50 pounds less now than I did at my heaviest, so I am no longer morbidly obese, but I am still obese. I am 6'3" and 275 pounds. At my heaviest I was 333 pounds. I can't be happy just because I am no longer morbidly obese. I need to be healthy. 

I am playing a dangerous game and it needs to stop. Just because I can live a functional life at the weight I am doesn't mean that I should. I need to change while I still can, while I have the ability to. I am 57 years old and I need to realize that I am living on borrowed time. 

I am selfish. This is painful for me to acknowledge, but it is the truth. I have chosen to eat too much food and to not exercise enough because of laziness and selfishness. I need to stop this behavior immediately. This isn't just a matter of what I'm doing to my body, it is an issue of how I relate to my family. I'm not giving them my best, and it pains me to acknowledge this, especially on Father's Day. 

So, the matter is urgent. I need to face my issues with urgency or they won't be faced at all. This doesn't mean that I will lose all of my weight and get healthy immediately. It just means that I need to look at each day as an opportunity to be better, to get better, to become healthier. Today is the day, not tomorrow. This matter is urgent. 

Key Value Proposition

Today is the day to act, not tomorrow. Be urgent in taking your health seriously. 

The Problem of Great Expectations

Every time I start on a journey to improve my health I have great expectations. I imagine how much weight I'm going to lose, and more significantly, how quickly I'm going to lose it. These great expectations are exciting and motivating as long as I'm making great progress. When the inevitable setbacks occur then these great expectations backfire. So what is a person to do?

It is hard to be motivated to start on a journey of weight loss without having great expectations, but if they are going to sabotage success then a different approach needs to be taken. The focus needs to change from great expectations of outcomes an to a focus on process. What am I doing on a daily basis to lose weight? Results follow action, so I need to ask what actions am I doing to bring about the results?

Changing focus is liberating, and it shouldn't be painful, but that doesn't mean that it is easy. Just like old habits are hard to break, so to is changing focus. You have to continually remind yourself to take your eyes off of the huge outcome you want and to think about the activities you are doing on a daily, or moment by moment basis to bring about results. Just like developing any habit, the more you do it the more natural it will be and the more it will happen. Write reminders to 

Key Value Proposition

Stop focussing on the huge improvements you want to make and focus instead on the daily habits and the processes that bring about the results you want to see.